People who are pessimistic always go about life reeking and dropping off negative energies anywhere they go to and with whoever they come in contact with.
They always see the bad in every good and they always seek ways to put other people down. They stir up emotions and get on people’s nerves.
When you come in contact or spend time with anybody who carries negative energy around, you end up being drained physically, mentally and emotionally.

So what should you do when you come in contact with a negative and highly pessimistic individual or you find yourself in an environment full of negative individuals?

The first thing you should do is be compassionate and listen to them. Give them that benefit of doubt that their pessimism and negativity is a phase that will pass and fade. There is a possibility that their negativity is as a result of a bad experience they are going through at the moment. Give them time and help them out if you can.

If after giving them enough time and you notice they are a habitual pessimist, you should seek ways to protect yourself from them at all cost because negative energy is contagious and if care is not taken, you may find yourself being consumed by hostility.

How do you deal with negative people?

  1. Do not immerse yourself in their negativity: This does not imply that you avoid them or run away from them, just don’t allow yourself to be too into them and their issues. Maintain a long emotional distance from them, don’t attempt to change them and don’t expect so much from them either.
  2. Know that it is not your duty to solve their problems: Do not take on their problems as yours and don’t step into that “saviour position” and attempt to save them. It is not your duty to make an unhappy person happy and you cannot switch a negative person to a optimistic individual overnight. Lend a listening ear and give opinions only when you are asked to. Don’t go giving unsolicited opinions.
  3. Set boundaries: Know your limit and know how much you can take. Don’t allow yourself become an emotional dump site for them.
    You also do not have to always be available every time they need you especially when they leave you drained and empty after every encounter. Protect yourself and your energy. Set boundaries and know when and where to draw the curtain.
  4. Determine how the conversation goes: A conversation with a negative person most likely will be filled with complains, grumblings and worries. There is only so much worries and grumblings you can listen to before you become tired. You can take charge of the discussion by asking questions that steer the individual from the bad side of things to the positive side. Make them see things from another perspective and through another lens.
  5. Don’t take things personally: You never know what a person is going through or how rough or bad their day is going. So when they tend to be negative or give off bad vibes, be patient with them and just smile. Don’t tame their words or actions personally because it is not really about you.

Sometimes, the negative person is you, most times due to the rough day you are having, you tend to become negative and give off negative vibes to other people.
How should you deal with your own negativity?

  1. Know and accept that you are not your emotions: Your emotions are only a reflection of how you feel and not who you are. Don’t be carried away by the emotions you feel, take some time and allow yourself process these emotions.
  2. Accept they these emotions are after all, temporary.
  3. Smile and stay calm: This is a way of showing control over the emotion or negativity you feel.
    “Smiling means that we are ourselves, that we have sovereignty over ourselves, that we are not drowned into forgetfulness.”
    -Thich Nhat Hanh, Being Peace.
  4. Find out the things that makes you negative and deal with them: If it is an environment that rouses your negativity, walk away from that environment. Take a break and clear your head and mind, go to a different environment.
  5. Shut down anything and everything that brings negativity to you and leaves you drained, tired and empty.
  6. Focus on the things that brings you peace and satisfaction. Occupy yourself with things you enjoy doing the most, focus on things you are passionate about and that takes you further in life and towards your dreams.
  7. Hangout with people who are positive and are optimistic: They help you build your confidence and stay afloat rather than sink deep into the waters of self-pity and despair. They help you maintain a positive outlook and go through your phase of negativity.
  8. Sleep, rest or find time to be alone: Sleep repairs not just the body but also the mind. If you find yourself being negative as a result of a bad day or a bad experience, find time to sleep and rest. This way, you are able to get over it and also stop yourself from passing on the negativity to other people.

Negativity is an emotion you will have to face at some point or another. Sometimes, you face it from other other people and other times, the negativity is a product of your own emotions. Regardless of where it comes from, it is important to learn how to deal with it as it comes and rather than allowing it control and determine your actions and reactions, you are better in control of your actions and emotions.

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